Saying “yes” is much easier than saying “no”. Almost everyone thinks so. But by saying “no” now and then, you are not only creating space in your agenda, but also in your head.
By following these tips, saying “no” has become a breeze.
6 tips to make saying “no” easier
1. Give yourself time to think
An easy way to tell if you want to say “yes” or “no” to something is to give yourself more time to think. Nobody thinks it’s crazy to say, “I’m going to think about that for a while.”
During this time, weigh the pros and cons against each other and take a close look at your calendar to see if there is actually room for it. This way you know for sure that you are making the right decision and that you don’t have to feel guilty.
2. Stick to “No”
Most people tend to put an entire explanation behind “no.” But this additional information is not really necessary. You do not owe the other an explanation. Don’t make it more complicated than it is, just “no” will do. By not coming up with an excuse, you are also preventing someone from trying to change your mind. Do you just think “no” sounds too blunt? Then say, “Sorry, this is not appropriate now” or “No, another time would be better.”
3. Come up with an alternative
Saying “no” is easier if you come up with an alternative. Suppose a friend suggests dinner together, but you feel like you’re in the evening alone. Then immediately set up another date to do something together or make a different proposal. You can do the same at work or study. You may not have time to help the other person with something now, but you will tomorrow or next week.
4. Find out what you’re afraid of
Do you really know why you find it difficult to say “no”? It may help to know that. If you find that you don’t dare to say “no,” ask yourself why you find it so difficult and what exactly are you afraid of. Perhaps you are afraid of not belonging or being lost. Or are you afraid of the other person’s reaction? By knowing why this is difficult, you gain more insight into your behavior and you can also change it.
5. Don’t feel guilty
Trite but true: If you say “no” to someone else, you are saying “yes” to yourself. So it’s not something you feel guilty about. Instead, be proud that you’re guarding your limits and your sense of when it’s best to say “no.”
Also try to see that “no” is an answer to a question and not a refusal toward the person asking the question. If the other person takes it personally, there is nothing you can do about it.
6. Make an appointment with yourself
At the beginning of the week, look at your calendar and mark the days or evenings you don’t want to plan anything. Maybe you like to exercise or do nothing for a while. By putting this time in your agenda, you won’t miss it. Saying “no” also becomes easier, because you already have a date. Nobody wants to know it’s a date with yourself.
By the way, wouldn’t you want your boss to say “no”? Then ask for a salary increase and Give one of these reasons.
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Do you find it difficult to say “no”? These tips will help you